DUI suspect shows up at police station drunk

Before we get started, driving drunk is bad. Very bad. Don't do it--call a friend or relative, a cab, use public transportation, walk, or even just sleep it off wherever you are, if that's a possibility. In my college drinking days, I always spent the night in the house/with the friends I was drinking with. I especially encourage this if you're drinking underage, when the consequences of getting caught are pretty terrible. But let me say it again--never drive drunk. You're endangering yourself and others, which isn't okay.

That said, this story out of Uniontown is kind of great. And terrible and maybe sad.

A Dunbar man went to the booking center in Uniontown to be fingerprinted for a DUI charge...and he drove there drunk.

An officer at the station noticed an odor of alcohol on Kroll’s breath as he was filling out paperwork for a previous DUI arrest. The booking center desk officer, Patrolman Delbert DeWitt, had noticed Kroll pull up to the booking center parking lot, pull out, then return to the lot between 3:49 p.m. and 3:50 p.m. Kroll got out of a pickup truck on the driver’s side and entered the booking center.

A breathalyzer indicated his blood-alcohol level was .089, while a blood test later showed a .086. The legal limit is .08...but no silly test can gauge whether or not you're too impaired to drive, amirite?! He claimed he hadn't had a drink since the night before, but given that this happened at almost 4 in the afternoon, he would've had to have been really, dangerously drunk if that's the case.

“That’s a first for us,” said Uniontown Lt. Tom Kolencik. “His original charge was a DUI and to come in intoxicated is disrespectful to the judicial system and disrespectful to the police.”

Look, I'm not gonna dispute that. But did anyone consider the fact that this man is probably an alcoholic, a man with a very serious problem? I doubt he was downing beers shouting, "Fuck the police!" And if my instincts are right, I hope he gets help and not just legal troubles.

It's been a good with for Pennsylvania drunkards, though. A Somerset man set up a fake DUI checkpoint while intoxicated...and was charged with a DUI, impersonating a public servant, and unlawful restraint.

Lay off the booze, guys, and make smart decisions.