County Crime Round-Up

• A gang of teenage girls is terrorizing Uniontown, and not in the usual way teenage girls terrorize people. They're actually beating people up, robbing them, and all that crazy fun stuff that never happens in this county. Talk about mean girls.
• A jury might get to see the very car a man used to run over his wife.
• An Allegheny County property tax assessor has been accused of stealing thousands of dollars from a Fayette County assessor's association. Come on, now! We have any people stealing within the county to worry about. Besides, how much can we really have to steal? 
• Two people from Belle Vernon are charged with burglarizing a Fayette County woman's apartment--after taking her to the hospital. I guess you have to take advantage of any opportunity to steal, especially if you're stealing an elderly woman's prescriptions. During the ride to the hospital, one of the criminals went in the woman's purse and took money and her keys. What happened to subtlety? It's like they weren't even trying!
• A Uniontown woman faces charges in a stabbing. She caught her man cheating, so she "beat his woman's ass" and then stabbed him. I'll grant that being cheated on is, I'm sure, fury-enducing, but I  will never understand why some women think an unfaithful partner justifies violence and destruction. Best of all, she put the bloody knife BACK IN THE DRAWER and the woman told police she was willing to pay a fine for stabbing him. Um, fines are for things like the speeding ticket I got on 40 last week. Not stabbings. I'm convinced that the county's criminals have no concept of law and they do these things because they really think they can.
• Guards at SCI-Fayette were running a fight club which involved them placing bets in fights between inmates. It was uncovered by someone who wrote a letter to the department's office of special investigations and intelligence. That fool! He/she broke the first rule of Fight Club!
• There's been an increase in daylight burglaries, so lock up your shit. More than 300 have been investigated. Police want people to keep an eye on any suspicious or strange vehicles in their neighborhoods and report strange phone calls. Homes that are being targeted are ones grouped in neighbors, more than rural homes.
• A Uniontown man has been imprisoned for arson--in order to cover up a burglary. Good job there. Somehow not too exciting after the arsonist in Connellsville a few years ago.