People of Uniontown Walmart

Who doesn't love lengthy texts from their brother on a Saturday night about a horrible Walmart experience?! He pretty much sums up my thoughts, too, in the following guest post, possibly because I made some of these points in my texts--and remember, he's a former Pechin's cashier, which he is still very cranky about. Enjoy. And important life lesson: the shortest line is occasionally the worst line.

If we can take away anything from the always enjoyable peopleofwalmart.com, it’s that the best way to understand Americans is to visit your local Walmart. In the case of the Uniontown Walmart, not only is it a great way to study Americans, but it truly allows you to assess the people of the Nam, as well.

A friend of mine and his girlfriend needed a ride to Walmart. My girlfriend and I took them, and they shopped and got what they needed. We made our way to the registers, and the ones open each had a long line (as per the norm, since they only have like five registers open at a time). We found the shortest line, only to discover shortly afterward we had made a bad decision. Walmart’s policy about matching any other stores’ prices was in full effect here, folks. This lady had advertisements from Shop ‘N' Save and Giant Eagle and made damn sure the cashier matched the prices of every single item she had. The cashier needed a price check, and so the waiting game started as someone had to run back and check the price on whatever needed checked.

After some time, a line was forming--a long, annoyed, pissed-off line. I was standing next to my girlfriend, and she whispered to me about an elderly couple behind us complaining. I hadn’t heard anything, but as soon as I started listening, there came the F-bombs. Side note: they were with their grandson who was maybe four years old at most. “I am paying to stand in line!” said the grandmother; “We only have 5 items!” said the grandfather. Those were pretty much the only lines said that did not include an F-bomb. Classy, right? At some point, the grandmother stormed off to the nearest bench, still dropping F-bombs along the way. I couldn’t tell what else was said, but I heard a lot of snickering and bickering coming from behind us. Luckily enough, the price was finally discovered and we were out the door. I just hope that cashier didn’t receive hell from anyone in the rest of that line.

 I have a couple of observations/comments to make here:

1) If you can get your groceries somewhere cheaper, why bother making a trip to Walmart? You just wasted your time and everyone else’s. If you don’t like the prices, go somewhere else.

2) No one pays to stand in a line, so shut up. The cashier was simply doing her job and things happen. It isn’t her fault whatsoever.

3) If you only have five items, why the hell did you not go to a damn express lane?! If you would use the time and energy you put into complaining to instead find an express lane, you would have been home in minutes.

 You stay classy, Fayette County.