The Nam: A (Sort Of) Tour

Not everyone is from Fayette County, meaning not everyone realizes how stupid things like having Walmart stores in Brownsville, Uniontown, and Connellsvile are. So I'm armed with a county map and ready to take you on a virtual tour of the Nam - notable people, places, and stories.

Bullskin Township - Recently made the news when the roof of a shed blew on to 119 during the most ridiculous wind ever the other day.

Everson - Right across the bridge from Scottdale. Why is Scottdale not on the map? It's in Westmoreland County. Why is this relevant? Because a man dressed as a ninja left his son home alone. Some people thought this did, in fact, happen in the Nam. The rest of us are left wishing but finding ways to blog about it anyway.

Dawson - Okay, I'm only in Dawson when we raft there. Home of the former Cafe Noswad and a current massive flea market. Very close to Layton, home of Buffalo Bill's house from The Silence of the Lambs. Not on the map, because I don't think most people care.

Connellsville - Considered one of Fayette County's cities. I'm told it used to be awesome. Launching point of said rafting trips to Dawson, former home of Coffee on Crawford, and current home of the Youghiogheny River Trail, my high school, and The Clarks.

South Connellsville - Former home of me.

Dunbar - Home of Pechin's, the Laurel Mall flea market, and the Fayette County Fair. They still have last year's schedule up, so I can't talk you into coming to see the debauchery for yourselves - yet.

Caparis - Home of these bigass cliffs. Oh, and some mines and a cave and things like bears and mountain lions or some other large animals that could eat people, because when I lived in South Connellsville my dad would always be like, "Hey, let's go to Casparis" but we never would because he wanted to take a gun and my mom was very concerned.

Normalville - I actually know nothing about Normalville but I'm guessing there's nothing normal about it.

Uniontown - Fayette County's other city. Better than Connellsville because it has a mall - a real one - and IHOP and stuff.

Jumonville - Home of a huge cross. Because of it's size and location in the mountains, it can be seen from up to 50 miles away, in three states and seven counties. I can see it from my house in Lemont Furnace, unless the weather is really terrible. Note that Lemont Furnace didn't make the map, once again probably because no one cares.

Fallingwater - The coolest place in the Nam.

Kentuck Knob - Probably as cool as Fallingwater since Frank Lloyd Wright built them both, but I've never been there. It took me something like 19 years to get to Fallingwater, thanks to my parents and school field trips depriving me my whole life.

Farmington - Home of Nemacolin.

Fort Necessity - Yeah, I bet you didn't know the Nam has a national battlefield. For some reason, I was really obsessed with it when I was little and asked my dad to take me all the time. I think I just liked walking around in fields and woods.

Actually, this entire post has reminded me of how beautiful our mountains are and inspired me to move.