Thursday, June 2, 2011

Rogue Ice Cream Truck Driver Charged

One of the feuding ice cream truck drivers is now parked in jail.

No, it wasn't more shenanigans with a rival company. He broke into his boss' home and tried to beat him with a baseball bat over money. Because who needs to fight with a rival when you can stir things up right in your own company? I mean, what's the worst that could happen?

This reminds me of an assault on a priest last year. The cause was similar--a church employee was afraid of losing his job, so he went to scare the priest with an axe. Which doesn't make sense. If you think your job is in danger, physically attacking someone isn't going to help you. Then again, Fayette County has never been the most logical place.

Fayette County also has never been one to let their drama die. The great thing about the internet is that you can watch the eruption of crazy as it happens, like when media coverage isn't enough and you have to comment on news articles to keep the publicity alive.

Miss Polly tries to make it clear there's no rivalry between companies--the problem is one "rogue driver." And that's fine, except that other companies are kind of rivals by default and after these comments, there clearly are some problems between them. She also implies the paper got the story wrong when really, it doesn't seem like they did. Polly says there "was no argument," and that may be true, but one driver basically harassing another does qualify as a "dispute," and when that's involving location and profits it is a sort of ridiculous turf war. And no one can take this story seriously. It's not like the police completely ignored the problem, as Polly implies, or that the paper sensationalized the story. Two feuding ice cream truck drivers will always be ridiculous. The story was made outrageous by existing (although the puns from the media did help).

Then someone complains about how the paper can't get local politics right, which is impressive and unsurprising. No one ever says what exactly the problem is, except for once when someone told me the H-S is too liberal. At a community festival.

Then attacked bossman Swaney lays down the law and says, probably correctly, that neither driver was innocent and Miss Polly really is jumping on a story that doesn't involve her or her company. Swaney, who's been pretty quiet about this whole thing publicly, said he changed the driver's route and that said driver had "personal problems" recently.

In closing, this is why the terrorists hate us and I will sympathize with whichever company drives through my neighborhood and actually gives me enough time to get money without having to chase a truck down the street. Or gives my dog treats, even though that beast doesn't need any.


  1. Actually what I said was... There was a friendly rivally between our companies and that there was not a "turf war" between the companies, that there was on "rogue" driver causing the issue. And as you can see, Yes! he was causing issues and caused a lot more. No! we did not cause the issue, Mr. Geisel, ran us off the road. Sorry if this isnt as dramatic as you like, but that is what happened. There are witnesses. We did not jump on any story that didnt involve us either....Mary Robb Jackson from KDKA came to us and we told her exactly what we felt. That we were glad that he was off the road, so that some innocent child didnt get hurt and we were very happy that Mr. Swaney was not hurt and was able to defend himself. In closing, if the reporter from the Herald Standard would have returned my phone call and would not have posted the whole issue on the AP, this would never have gotten blow sky high. We always give our customers time to get their money out and we are the only ones who give treats to neighborhood dogs and sticker/gum to the kids. We do this for fun and to teach out children life lessons. Thanks Miss Polly

  2. I was referring to your comment on the news article online, not interviews with news stations.